Joy

As I was reading a friend's blog today, she was talking about how she has lost her joy, and she is on a journey to find it. I know the feeling. About 3-4 years ago I really began to realize that I am not a joyful person by nature. I think it is a generational thing in some of my family members, but even if I am happy about life, I don't tend to portray that. This really bugged me. I had to talk to someone. I asked a friend of mine (who always seemed to be joyful) what his secret was: how could he always be "up". He told me of a dream that he had had:

"I was at my own funeral, but nobody could see me. I was watching it all happen and shouting, 'I'm right here! Don't look in there, it isn't me! I'm alive, really!,' etc." He told me that he had become so "dead" that nobody could see him "alive". It was after that dream that he began to cry out to God to give him joy, and He did.

I have been praying the same thing, and although I am not completely changed, I believe God is helping me.

Colossians 1:9-12 "We pray that you'll have the strength to stick it out over the long haul-not the grim strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is a strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and beautiful that he has for us."

I love those verses from the Message. Really, no matter how I feel or circumstances around me, because of who He is and what He has done--that alone should give me joy.

God, may You be the lifter of my head.